I went to a frisbee tourney over the weekend and realized how amazing it felt to walk in knowing absolutely no one and having absolutely no one know you.

No politics, no expectations, NOTHING. You are everything you are capable of and more, and you believe it. At home people hear your name and attach you to your most competitive team… and even worse, your high school.

Here, I’m not some talentless East side kid who barely got on some overglorified junior team. I’m some chick that looks like she’s twelve from the other side of the world that can make a cut, catch, and throw. As far as I’m concerned, that’s all they need to know.

Next thing I know there’ll be bits of beef or chicken in my morning toast.

Clearly, my beliefs are not being respected.

My friends still use the word FAGGOT, GAY, QUEER, and HOMO around me.
My friends still throw paper in the garbage.
My friends still go out to eat at McDonald’s. Often.
My friends still leave their computers on overnight.
My mom still uses plastic bags for grocery shopping (even after we bought tote bags.)

My friends.
My mom.

Clearly, I have made no difference to the lives of the people around me. Thanks for the support, everyone. Knowing what all my efforts have amounted to feels fanfuckingtastic.

I depend way too much on others for my own happiness.

Note: Don’t worry, I get it. I shouldn’t expect to be able to change people to how I want them to be, but doing any one of those things, especially saying the word faggot, is a huge bitch slap to the face. It’s a “here’s what I think about your beliefs” and it hurts coming from the people I love and adore.